So Thanksgiving was just two days ago, and it was very eerie to say the least to be away from a holiday that means a lot to me and my family. This year my mother was also away from home, spending some time in Laos following the celebration of a wedding, so I can only imagine how weird it was for my two brothers, John and Jason to be without the only women in the house and half of our household. I didn’t realize what it meant to celebrate a "really American holiday", until I wasn’t in America because this past Thursday was just any regular Thursday in South Africa. I couldn’t even find a turkey to cook (not that I know how to cook a turkey), so I got a few roast chickens. With others in my program, we threw a potluck style Thanksgiving and had a celebration at the offices and classroom where our courses were held. Everyone brought delicious food, and we all spent was an eerie day for all us with laughter and full stomachs.
I must admit, I was pretty hurt and distraught when I realized that I would not be home for Thanksgiving. But then I realized to be in the situation I was, I was actually quite lucky and even more so than others to be able to travel and study abroad. (I guess this is where I hashtag, “first world problems” - #firstworldproblems) The course of my life has drastically change this past year, I was able to get an internship in Chicago, IL at a national non-profit organization, I am blessed with the opportunity to not only study abroad once but twice as I head off to Thailand in January for 4 months to study at Khon Kaen University. I am very thankful for the scholarships I have received from various donors to make this year abroad possible and I am extremely thankful for the support system of friends and family I have back home to encourage me to expand my horizons. I sometimes feel that I live in a dream and I don’t know my life could have come to this. The things I have experienced while being away from home are truly a blessing. These were things I had always hoped for in life, but never knew that they might actually happen.
As I follow the news back home of various matters such as Ferguson, I question more and more everyday of the person I would like to be for the world and for myself. I know that I have worked hard for everything that I have had the opportunity to experience, but in some ways I can’t help but think that I have also won the lottery. Some people are not as lucky. To realize how lucky I am does stir up a lot of feelings of guilt and questions of “Why Me?” but then turns into “Why not me?” and then “Why not anyone or everyone else?” I know this sounds like your “stereotypical story of any American girl who goes abroad and realizes how American she is” but I would like to think that my story is different. I think its different because I think I am coming to terms with realizing that I know who I am but I am still trying to decide on the person I want to be. Something like this could probably take years or a very long while before I understand the person I want to be and normally, this would make me cringe and cry not knowing but I think for the first time ever and I am okay with this. And for this awakening, I am truly grateful.
See you in less than two weeks – XO
KK
I must admit, I was pretty hurt and distraught when I realized that I would not be home for Thanksgiving. But then I realized to be in the situation I was, I was actually quite lucky and even more so than others to be able to travel and study abroad. (I guess this is where I hashtag, “first world problems” - #firstworldproblems) The course of my life has drastically change this past year, I was able to get an internship in Chicago, IL at a national non-profit organization, I am blessed with the opportunity to not only study abroad once but twice as I head off to Thailand in January for 4 months to study at Khon Kaen University. I am very thankful for the scholarships I have received from various donors to make this year abroad possible and I am extremely thankful for the support system of friends and family I have back home to encourage me to expand my horizons. I sometimes feel that I live in a dream and I don’t know my life could have come to this. The things I have experienced while being away from home are truly a blessing. These were things I had always hoped for in life, but never knew that they might actually happen.
As I follow the news back home of various matters such as Ferguson, I question more and more everyday of the person I would like to be for the world and for myself. I know that I have worked hard for everything that I have had the opportunity to experience, but in some ways I can’t help but think that I have also won the lottery. Some people are not as lucky. To realize how lucky I am does stir up a lot of feelings of guilt and questions of “Why Me?” but then turns into “Why not me?” and then “Why not anyone or everyone else?” I know this sounds like your “stereotypical story of any American girl who goes abroad and realizes how American she is” but I would like to think that my story is different. I think its different because I think I am coming to terms with realizing that I know who I am but I am still trying to decide on the person I want to be. Something like this could probably take years or a very long while before I understand the person I want to be and normally, this would make me cringe and cry not knowing but I think for the first time ever and I am okay with this. And for this awakening, I am truly grateful.
See you in less than two weeks – XO
KK